joi, 22 iunie 2017

From tomorrow on, I will start to think of you

Today is my day. No, of course it is not my birthday. It is just a regular, normal day. But today is about myself. It is about my feelings and my concerns. It is about how am I feeling and how would I like to do things. I want again, to feel my pain, to hear my thoughts. To step aside and say ‘’no’’ if I need the mood to say it. I feel I am losing the sense of being a person. I am crawling in despair and I want to stay down, to feel the Earth, cold and alive. In pain and despair I find myself. I discover my inner spirit. I like the storms and thunders because it sounds like my inner scream. I like rain because there is always place for hope. I like the smell of rottenness because it is a sign that there was life… And for now, I can only think of myself. Tomorrow, it will be a new day...

miercuri, 14 iunie 2017

The sound of music

Every dance we had was like a statement. Every word we wrote to each other was like an eternity described in acronyms. It was just you and me, without interruptions. It was centuries ago, when we first opened the cupboard, full of letters. Were the letters to our future. We designed our future together, but separately. We wrote it together, using the same pencil. We wrote it for us but also against us. It is strange, right? I knew then, but unfortunately, I do not know anymore. I want to dance again. On that song we asked for to our anniversary. I’ve been asking for it, over and over. But I am sure you do not even remember. Do you know it? It was our favorite song. I will send you a letter. Later, maybe. Or, never…

marți, 13 iunie 2017

Always waiting

I am there, in the shadow of my feelings. I am afraid to acknowledge them, to let them outside. I think it would be a better idea to get them in chains, to get them drowned into my ancestors tears. I have been here waiting for redemption. Instead, I received love...I was here waiting for signs... Instead, I received only tenderness. I have always been waiting for something, for someone. I have never thought about maybe I was waiting for myself. To become, to be... Maybe, someday I will receive what I am waiting for. Waiting...the most disturbing state.